Reflection and Resolution
by RoseyChickadee
Summary: On the eve of the new year, a certain detective's widow contemplates the twists and turns that led from her first husband's death to having a policeman for a husband and two wonderful children. Former L x OC, current Matsuda x OC with OC kids


**_Happy New Year, everybody! This is that special story that I talked about!  
_**

**_This is something that I've had for a while, and I just sort of sat on it because I wanted to wait for the perfect time to release it. I'm currently working on the main story for this one and the first chapter should be up sometime between now and-June._**

**_Just a side note, this is not the main story. That story will better explain the events that led up to this story :) (...when it comes out...)_**

**_Anyway, Death Note doesn't belong to me; Tsugumi Ohba and Takeshi Obata have that honor. I do own Abigail and her children Ryu and Tsukiyo._**

* * *

_She…she was back in her and her husband's first apartment. Sitting on their couch, their modest Christmas tree glimmering in the far corner of the living room, she could feel the fleece blanket wrapped around her. Her head turned and saw him fiddling in the kitchen, grabbing the chai tea and the rice cakes and crackers that they had made together earlier this same day. _

_ When he finally came out of the kitchen with the tray of food and drinks, she stood up, awkwardly albeit, and made her way to him. She took two of the crackers off the tray and ate them before he could protest. He smiled at her exasperatedly, pointedly moving the tray out of her reach while he carried it the rest of the way to the living room and slid it onto the coffee table._

_ She managed to snag one of the rice cakes when her husband was pouring the tea, making him comment, "Please make sure to share some with me, Abigail."_

_ Gently, she used her free hand to make him put the kettle down while the other put the rice cake halfway into her mouth. He simply rolled his eyes at her attention-seeking gesture but went with it anyway, grabbing the offered half carefully between his teeth and purposefully brushing his lips against hers as he bit down on the cake. He pulled her into his arms as they both chewed on their portion of the cake and held her like that for a while after he had finished. The moment was broken by his cell phone buzzing in his pocket. A quick peck on her forehead and he pulled it out, holding it in his usual manner as he answered it and walked down the hall that led to the rooms._

_ "Hello?...Watari? Is something wrong?" _

_ Abigail walked around the corner into the hall just as her husband ducked into the study. She followed him and stood in the doorway as he typed furiously with his free hand. For Watari to call this late on a New Year's Eve, two things had to have happened simultaneously: an epidemic and a challenge. Her suspicions were confirmed not even a second later when windows began popping up all over the screen of his laptop._

_ After a second of quiet contemplation, he responded to whatever Watari said. "I'll take this case." She began to duck out of the room, assuming that he'd get straight to work on it, when she heard something that surprised and stopped her. "But I won't work on it until the 2nd or the 3rd. I have…" He swiveled his chair around and smiled at her "…other plans. Thank you, Watari, and have a happy New Year."_

_ He snapped the phone shut and placed it on his desk before standing and walking up to her. She let out an undignified squeak as he scooped her off her feet and carried her to the living room. Sitting down on the couch in such a way that she was positioned comfortably on his lap, he rested his head in the crook of her neck and collarbone._

_ She found her voice as he sat there holding her. "Why did you postpone that, love? You know I don't mind if you work while you're here."_

_ "Well, I mind having to work when I promised to devote my time to you during the holidays. Besides," He lifted his head to smirk at her, "even though it's an interesting case, I can tell with almost 83% certainty that it's going to be painfully easy."_

_ She rolled her eyes at his confidence as he laid his head back down and glanced at the clock. The hands shifted to read 11:59 just then and she stated wistfully, "I can't believe this year is almost over…Part of me wants it to last a little longer."_

_ Her husband started rubbing her back and muttered, "I want the next year to already be here."_

_ 45 seconds…_

_ She smiled and placed a hand on her slightly distended stomach. "I can't imagine why."_

_ His unoccupied hand joined hers there and their fingers interlaced. He raised his head again, his tired, dark-rimmed eyes showing such depth of emotion that it almost made her cry._

_ 30 seconds…_

_ "But I would be lying if I said I wasn't even a little bit afraid," he continued softly._

_ She leaned forward, making their foreheads touch, and stared deep into his dark brown eyes with her silvery blue ones. "I am too…"_

_ 15 seconds…_

_ He smiled warmly at her then. "I love you, Abigail Princeton."_

_ 10…_

_ She returned the expression and wrapped her arms around his neck. "I love you, too, Lawliet Princeton."_

_ 5…4…_

_ They leaned into each other, lips lightly parted…_

_ 2…1…_

Abigail's eyes shot open, sweat drenching her skin and making her blonde hair and silk nightgown cling to her frame. She sat up and brought her knees to her chest, not hesitating to wrap her arms around her legs. It was the same every time she had a dream about her deceased husband. They would be so vivid and real that they would bring her a contentedness and happiness that would just soothe and comfort every part of her aching heart and soul. Then she'd wake up at the happiest point of the memory, and what parts of her that had been healed, whether fully or partially, would be crushed by the cold harshness of her reality.

Her late husband, the best detective the world had ever known, was dead, murdered by the first person after her that had been named his friend.

She could still remember when Roger had sent her a message telling her that he had something important to tell her. It had taken her no time at all to grab her and Lawliet's son, Ryu, who was almost two at the time, and a few essentials before making the trip to Winchester on a private jet that was funded by the House. During the two-stop flight, once in Hawaii and again in Ontario, she called up her parents in Italy to see if they could all meet at the airport in Bournemouth, England, the closest one to Winchester. Once she finally landed and made it to the orphanage, she was grateful she had invited her parents to come; for when she heard of Lawliet's murder, something inside of her snapped and she stopped functioning. Her parents had taken her and Ryu to their home in a little town on the coast of Palermo, Sicily's jurisdiction, located somewhere between Palermo and Cefalu, and there they took care of them.

Months passed, and before any of them knew it, two whole years had passed since her husband's death. There had been no funeral at his passing; her father had had to pull some strings but had managed to have Lawliet's ashes delivered to them. He had even arranged for a family friend in Japan to clean and maintain the apartment in Abigail's absence.

But the day after the 2-year mark of Lawliet's death, Abigail straightened herself up and began anew. She remained with her parents for another month and then returned to Japan with Ryu, who would be turning four in less than two months' time. It hadn't been too long after his birthday that she used her bachelor degree in high school education and her contacts in Japan's Board of Education to land a teaching job at a high school that had direct links to the preschool that Ryu would be attending.

Another 5 years passed, and the ache of Lawliet's passing had diminished significantly. However, it remained with Abigail and became more prominent when she looked at their son and saw the similarities he shared with his late father. Their lives were peaceful and relatively stress-free, and then an incident occurred at the high school Abigail worked at…

A noise, small and sad, suddenly began emitting from her left. Abigail's head shot up and immediately spotted the source: the walkie-talkie baby monitor on her nightstand. She threw the covers off and stood on the floor, grabbing her night robe and sliding it on as she exited the bedroom. She practically ran to the next room down the hall, but managed to open the door gently. Scanning the room, she found nothing foreign to the baby room that would be causing her little one distress; but she went over to the crib anyway and scooped her two-month-old daughter out, cradling her to her chest and muttering words of comfort to the little angel.

The sound of the door opening behind her drew her attention, and her current husband of three years was standing there, his hair a disheveled mess and his nightclothes slightly askew.

"Is…" He covered his mouth as he yawned. "Is everything okay, Abigail?"

She smiled apologetically at him as she walked up to him, stroking his hair. "Yes. Did I wake you, Touta?"

Matsuda shook his head and grabbed her hand, stroking the back of it with his thumb. "Not really. I was half awake before you rushed to check on Tsukiyo."

Said little angel either knew her name or her father's voice, possibly both, because she turned her head and gave a toothless grin, squealing and reaching for him. Matsuda smiled helplessly but scooped her out her mother's arms regardless, holding her so that her head rested on his shoulder.

Once he was certain that he wouldn't drop Tsukiyo, Matsuda addressed Abigail, suggesting, "Why don't we watch the live broadcasting of the countdown in Tokyo square since we're up?"

Abigail, still smiling, nodded her assent. "Perhaps Ryu would also like to join us."

Matsuda leaned a bit out of the doorway, looking a little further down the hall where that same teen's room was located. "Are you sure he's awake, love?"

Her only response was to nod and walk down the hall to Ryu's room. She stood in front of the door and inquired, "Why don't you go ahead and join us, Ryu?"

The door opened slowly and Ryu shuffled out, looking just slightly guilty about being caught. But if Abigail had been upset or angry at the fact that he hadn't been sleeping, she didn't show it; she simply kissed his forehead and gave him a push towards the living room. Matsuda followed after him, pausing for a second to grace his wife's lips with a chaste kiss.

As she followed her family and sat on the couch between Matsuda and Ryu, who was allowing his little step-sister to sit on his lap, she remembered how much marrying Matsuda had helped her and Ryu, especially. Matsuda had been just the father figure that Ryu had needed, someone who could have fun but still have a firm hand when needed. They had started their relationship four years ago through an omiai, but the two of them had actually first met a year before that when a student at Abigail's high school brought a gun to school with him.

Abigail had been teaching her last Home Economics class of the day when she had seen panicked students and faculty running past her room in the direction of the school's entrance. Upon questioning a few of them, she knew exactly what was going on and ran in the opposite direction of the fleeing students and teachers. When she was almost there, she noticed police cars pulling up outside and doubled her pace. She found the student, one who she knew to be a constant victim of bullying, holed up in a classroom with the bullies. She had managed to almost completely defuse the situation when the police officers were halfway to the classroom, and by the time those same officers had arrived at the scene, it had been completely defused, with the bullied student calmed and the bullies verbally chastised. Matsuda had been in that group of officers and, as they took select statements and witness testimonies, he quietly marveled at how strong and courageous she was, especially for a civilian. He never got to tell her that before they had had to go their separate ways, but he had heard the school's superintendent at the time was charged with negligence that led to that event and replaced. He and Abigail were both surprised when a year after all that, they met through an omiai.

The one and only thing that didn't work out for their relationship at the beginning was Ryu. From the first time she told him about her new relationship, he fought with her over it whenever the topic arose and protested any time she would go out on a date with Matsuda, whom he didn't meet until much later. However, when Matsuda and Ryu met for the first time, what was odd was that, by the time Matsuda left, Ryu's attitude on the matter did a complete one-eighty. He still found ways to give Matsuda a hard time, at least until the wedding. He then settled into the role of Matsuda's step-son with no problem.

Then nearly a year ago, Abigail had found that she was pregnant for a second time. The memories that Tsukiyo's term brought forth of the time she had carried Ryu in the same manner would sometimes cripple her with emotions that were amplified by her unstable hormones. Regardless of what state she was in, both Matsuda and Ryu had been understanding and ultimately supportive during that whole time. And from the time she was born, Tsukiyo had both her father and older step-brother wrapped around her chubby little fingers.

Yet, of all the unexpected things that had happened during her time with Matsuda, the biggest shock had been to find out that he had been on the original Task Force that had been helping Lawliet with the Kira case. He had even been there when her husband had died and when his murderer had been brought to justice. At one point, he had even taken to the house of another Force member to meet the rest of the team; they had all ended up holding a small, informal remembrance gathering for those they and others had lost during the case.

All in all, she found herself moving forward. Picking herself up after Lawliet's death, getting a job to support Ryu and herself, meeting and later marrying Matsuda, giving birth to Tsukiyo, all these things and more were helping her put one foot in front of the other and continue on with her life.

She snapped out of her thoughts when Matsuda wrapped an arm around her shoulders and kissed her temple. As the news reporter on the screen announced the one minute mark to midnight on this New Year's Eve, he whispered, "Look at Ryu and Tsukiyo, Abby."

She turned her head and felt her heart melt. The two of them had already fallen asleep, Ryu with his chin tucked to his chest and Tsukiyo using his arm as a pillow while he held her in a hug.

30 seconds…

Matsuda pulled Abigail onto his lap and wrapped his arms around her, whispering, "Perhaps when Tsukiyo's older, we'll make another sibling for them and pray that they'll all be that close."

Abigail giggled quietly and replied, "Let's aim for when she turns five. Deal?"

15 seconds…

Her husband simply nodded and smiled warmly at her, his earthy brown eyes showing her al his love for her as she did the same to him with her silvery blue eyes. "I love you, Abigail Princeton Matsuda."

10 seconds…

Quelling the immense feeling of déjà vu that came with his proclamation, Abigail returned his smile with one of her own and wrapped her arms around his neck. "I love you, too, Touta Matsuda."

5…

4…

3…

They leaned in to each other, their lips lightly parted…

2…

1…

And as their clock struck midnight, signaling the beginning of the new year, and the news announcer wished the viewers a Happy New Year, husband and wife shared their first kiss of the year. Matsuda's hands began to roam her back and Abigail leaned deeper into the kiss, realizing that while her past was riddled with pain, she had the love and support of family and friends to help her move forward.

She intended to continue doing so.

* * *

Let it go,  
Let it roll right off your shoulder  
Don't you know  
The hardest part is over  
Let it in,  
Let your clarity define you  
In the end  
We will only just remember how it feels

Our lives are made  
In these small hours  
These little wonders,  
These twists & turns of fate  
Time falls away,  
But these small hours,  
These small hours still remain

Let it slide,  
Let your troubles fall behind you  
Let it shine  
Until you feel it all around you  
And i don't mind  
If it's me you need to turn to  
We'll get by,  
It's the heart that really matters in the end

Our lives are made  
In these small hours  
These little wonders,  
These twists & turns of fate  
Time falls away,  
But these small hours,  
These small hours still remain

All of my regret  
Will wash away somehow  
But I cannot forget  
The way I feel right now

In these small hours  
These little wonders  
These twists & turns of fate  
These twists & turns of fate  
Time falls away but these small hours  
These small hours, still remain,  
Still remain  
These little wonders  
These twists & turns of fate  
Time falls away  
But these small hours  
These little wonders still remain

**"Little Wonders" by Rob Thomas**

* * *

_**That song was what I was listening to when I came up with the theme for this story, so if you want to, try re-reading the story and listening to song while you do :)  
**_

_**I hope you enjoyed reading, and wish you all a wonderful year~!**_


End file.
